Bowels of Mercy

Mosiah 15: 9 Having ascended into heaven, having the bowels of mercy; being filled with compassion towards the children of men; standing betwixt them and justice; having broken the bands of death, taken upon himself their iniquity and their transgressions, having redeemed them, and satisfied the demands of justice.

This verse talks  about the Savior, and the role He plays in our lives. The Savior is our salvation, and our strength, and our source of “becoming.   We can see  true principles here. The scripture begins by saying that the Savior  had the bowels of mercy, the compassion -- which gave him the strength to stand between us (sinners) and justice.  He could not have done that without the mercy and compassion that he felt.  

In a similar way, we are invited to learn to school our emotions, and to feel emotions of goodness and love, which will give us strength to do what we need to do also.  Everything is a type and shadow of our Savior, and all things follow a pattern.  I think of this as Principle #3 of emotional health:   Emotions leads to action.

It is my prayer that as we understand this, we will more fully appreciate the role of the Savior in our lives.  Truly he works with us to heal our “negative” emotions and help us come to peace.  As we learn of Him, we will be strengthened.

Overwhelmed?

Overwhelmed?

Have you ever felt totally overwhelmed?  I sure have.

Demands press down on us.  We have responsibilities and pressures.  There are things that must be done, and we are not sure how to do them.  In addition, we don’t think there is time to do it all.

We are overwhelmed.

What do we need in a situation like that?

Principle:  Our feelings tell us what we need.

Surprisingly enough,we don’t need a solution to a problem, or more energy, or a magical person to come along and help us get it all done.

We need courage.

COURAGE:  mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty.

Elder Henry B. Eyring said this:

The Lord promised love for others and courage to the Prophet Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery when the tasks ahead of them could have seemed overwhelming. The Lord said that needed courage would come from their faith in Him as their rock:

“Fear not to do good, my sons, for whatsoever ye sow, that shall ye also reap; therefore, if ye sow good ye shall also reap good for your reward.

“Therefore, fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail.

Principle:  Our feelings tell us what we need.

Many times when we feel overwhelmed, we need courage.  Our tasks seem daunting.  We don’t know how to proceed.  We are confused, and we don’t think we have the energy to needed to be successful.  

Don't Overlook God's Role

We hear a lot about the “law of attraction” in terms of emotional health and well-being today.

The “law of attraction” has come to mean that what we focus on, expands.  What we think about, visualize with clarity, and focus on, is “drawn” into our experience.  It’s attracted to us.  The idea is our thoughts and feelings matter, and that they can attract what we want, or repel things from us.

The problem with the “law of attraction” as taught today is that it’s often misconstrued, and can very easily become a “philosophy of man.”

Sure, parts of the idea are true.  Our thoughts and feelings do matter.  What we focus on does matter.  Yet the danger is that if we overlook the Source of the law, or the Power behind the law, we will completely miss the mark, and worse, we will be distracted from what really matters.

The law of attraction is, in other words, incomplete at best, and misleading and dangerous at worst.

Helaman, in the Book of Mormon, actually warns us of the dangers of this type of philosophy.  He says:

“And thus we can see (in other words -- look to find the lesson ) how false, and also the unsteadiness of the hearts of the children of men; yea, we can see that the Lord in his great infinite goodness doth bless and prosper those who put their trust in him.” (Helaman 12:1)

Helaman is referring to what is happening to his people, the Nephites.  The people had been experiencing a time of great prosperity and peace, but lately they had been having problems with the Lamanites.  There were murders, and a great band of robbers was becoming a problem  Helaman tells the people that this is because they are forgetting their God, and that their prosperity came because of His blessings -- and their obedience to His commandments.

Helaman continues:

“Yea, and we may see at the very time when he doth prosper his people, yea, in the increase of their fields, their flocks, and their herds, and in gold, and in silver, and in all manner of precious things of every kind and art; sparing their lives, and delivering them out of the hands of their enemies; softening the hearts of their enemies that they should not declare wars against them; yea, and in fine, doing all things for the welfare and happiness of his people; yea, then is the time that they do harden their hearts, and do forget the Lord their God, and do trample under their feet the Holy One - yea, and this because of their ease, and their exceedingly great prosperity.” (Helaman 12:2)

Don’t we see this today?  To me, the law of attraction symbolizes the hardening of hearts, and the forgetting of the Lord our God.  The law of attraction as taught today does not talk about God.  It does not delineate the proper place of God in the affairs of man.

Yes, what I think about is important.  God wants us to have faith.  He wants us to be positive, and to believe.  But where do our blessings ultimately come from?  Do we just “attract” those blessings and the riches of prosperity to us, or do they come from God?  Is it important to acknowledge His hand in all things?  

The true danger of trusting in the law of attraction as “the law” is that it literally leaves out God.  If we trust only in that  law, we cannot see our true relationship to Him.  We may even come to believe that our success, our blessings, come because of OUR own ability, and that we do not even need God.  After all, if we can attract whatever we need, would we need God?  Taken to its extreme, that’s the logical progression of that path.

I believe that the law of attraction is a dangerous philosophy, and of man.  Instead, why don’t we focus on God’s laws, stated in scriptures?  Why don’t we think in terms of the Law of the Harvest?  

In the Law of the Harvest, we think of the way nature works.  First, we have soil.  The type of soil matters to the plant.  Then we have the seeds.  We get to choose what seeds to plant, but we have no power to make the seed.  The seed has life within itself, and we cannot make that.  That comes from the power of God.  So we choose what to plant, and we do the planting.  That is a lot like life.  We choose what to focus on, what to think, and what types of actions we want to plant in our life -- in our own “soil” or conditions of the heart.  Then we have to nurture those seeds.  We don’t doubt that they will grow, because we know God simply provides the seeds with the ability to grow. And they DO grow.

We see that God provides that, and we thank Him.  When the seeds grow enough, we are able to harvest the fruit -- again, acknowledging that it’s through God’s blessings that we have that fruit.  Yes, we did work in the garden, but we are not in charge of the law, nor how it works.

That’s the correct law, and it’s the correct way to think.  Leaving out God is dangerous.  Let’s not do that.  We don’t attract what we want in and of ourselves, due to our own effort alone.  

Moroni 10:7 reminds us:

“.....wherefore I would exhort you that ye deny not the power of God; for he worketh by power, according to the faith of the children of men…..”

I am grateful for the might, majesty, power, and love of God.

Consider Your Ways

Anxious thoughts plague us sometimes.  Worries, fears, and concerns are very real, and those anxious thoughts can be debilitating.  

What can we do about that?

The answer lies in a two-step process.  

First, “consider your ways.”  I love the scripture in Haggai, Chapter 1, beginning with verse 5.

5 Now therefore thus saith the Lord of hosts; Consider your ways.

6 Ye have sown much, and bring in little; ye eat, but ye have not enough; ye drink, but ye are not filled with drink; ye clothe you, but there is none warm; and he that earneth wages earneth wages to put it into a bag with holes.

7 ¶ Thus saith the Lord of hosts; Consider your ways.

The Lord is telling Haggai to talk to the people and help them understand.  They had problems, and they wanted to find the answers they needed.  It’s interesting, that what The Lord told them was first, to stop, and to “consider their ways.”  Many times when I have a problem, what I want is this:

An immediate solution that will simply take away the problem.

The Lord rarely works that way.  We are supposed to grow and learn, and to have experiences.  So each new problem or difficult or challenge is an opportunity to grow, and to become more like our Savior.  That’s really the issue, as the Lord sees it.  How can He help us use this particular situation to become more like HIm?  How can He help us develop more confidence in Him, or more patience, or more ability to understand, or help us gain more strength?  That’s HIS goal.

Many times, though, I forget that eternal perspective, and what I simply want is to “be out” of the problem.  I don’t particularly want to be stronger, or more patient or kind.  I just want “out.”

Yet the Lord does not always give me what I think I want.  He gives me what will be best for me.

So - consider our ways.  That’s the first step.

The second step is to do this:

Combine anxiety with faith.

Jacob 1:5 says: For because of faith and great anxiety, it truly had been made manifest unto us concerning our people, what things should happen unto them.

Notice that Jacob says he combined anxiety with faith.  He did not combine anxiety with fear, doubt, discouragement, or anything else.  He combined it with faith.

We can use this two-step process to help us deal with our anxious fears and thoughts.

 

   

                                                                         

Process: 

Consider your ways.

Combine anxiety with faith.

Example:

Janet (yes, this is a personal example) was simply overwhelmed.   I had many concerns.  One of my  children was really struggling with some honesty issues, and they were serious concerns.  Another child had a health issue that was very concerning, and so far nothing had helped.  That was a tremendous problem.  There were other things too.   found that I was so anxious about these different things, that I couldn’t focus, and I couldn’t think of anything else.  I needed to be able to calm down so that I could even think rationally about the issues, but I knew the anxiety was getting worse instead of better.

So - follow the process.  As soon as I began to consider my ways, I felt more hope.  First, I could see that I simply had not taken the time to pray.  Because I had been up constantly during the night, when I  woke up, it was to a critical crisis with a child. I had not yet managed to find a time to take a quiet moment to pray.  

I actually remember that day very well, because in that moment, I understood something.  I understood that the Lord knew how tired I was, but that He still wanted me to understand that I needed to pray.  How else would I find solutions?  I also knew that He understood the problem fully, and He knew that this was a day I didn’t actually have the ability to leave my children for even 10 minutes to go say a prayer.  BUT - I also knew that he expected me to pray anyway.  I realized that I could say to him, “Heavenly Father, I am moving to help a child, and this is my prayer time -- as I’m moving.  Please be with me.  Please help me to be able to have my body feel calm, as I consecrate my actions to Thee.  Please help me to help this child, as Thou would minister to this child.  Please help me to feel that, and to be guided by Thy Spirit.”  I could have prayed while running to the rescue!

Considering my ways helped me to see what I needed to do immediately in order to start the process of receiving answers.

How do I expect to RECEIVE if I have not taken the time to be receptive?

I had not been doing that.  My thoughts were like this:  What will I do if this health problem gets worse in Child #1?  And……………...how will we deal with the honesty issues with this child #2 -- they WILL get worse, and worse, and soon this child will be in trouble with others, and I know he will not listen to me, and he just does not care about anything or anyone………………….

That’s not faith.  

Instead, I could combine my anxiety with faith and choose to think thoughts like these:  

I have faith that Heavenly Father will help us figure out the health issue.  Have we considered a priesthood blessing?  Have I been praying that the doctors would be inspired to know how to help?  Have I been praying to know what topics I could research or study that would help us figure this out?

I have faith that Heavenly Father can teach me how to help my child really understand honesty and its importance.  What scripture stories can I share with my child that will touch his heart and help him feel the Spirit?  How does Heavenly Father teach His children how to be honest in the scriptures?  How can I make my home a place where the Spirit can be felt?  What are the principles that Heavenly Father uses to discipline His children?  How can i show more love to my child, and yet teach him of the principle of honesty?  

And - (this is extremely important) --  how can I trust that Heavenly Father will help me, so that I can let my body relax, and be able to feel of His peace?

Anxiety combined with faith is powerful.  It changes us inside - and it changes us on a bodily level, helping us to relax.  Instead of disabling, it becomes EN-ABLING as a powerful force, that will help us use problems to create good, and to enrich life.

Consider your ways.  Combine anxiety with faith.  A simple, effective, powerful solution.

Trials refine our emotions. Then blessings come.

From the Doctrine and Covenants, Section 103, verse 12:  “For after much tribulation, as I have said unto you in a former commandment, cometh the blessing.”

                                            

                                           
This is an important scripture, and it applies to emotional health in several ways.

First, there is tribulation.  That's a fact.  Life is not easy, and it's not meant to be easy.  In the gospel plan we are taught that it's necessary to have opposites, and that we learn and grow as we experience the opposites.  

It's not wrong to experience tribulation.  It's part of the plan.  It wouldn't be called tribulation if it wasn't hard, and it is natural for us to struggle and to become emotionally involved in that struggle.  Sometimes we think we're bad because we are having a hard time.  NO.

However, this scripture gives us comfort in tribulation.  We know that blessings come after we are tried.  That can give us the strength to look for our source of blessings - the Savior and Heavenly Father, and allow us to continue in faith through the "enduring" process.

This is a very different philosophy than one we are taught in the humanistic Law of Attraction.  The Law of Attraction says that we attract what we want as we focus on  those things.  Yes, to an extent.  But when we forget that blessings come after tribulation, we may not realize that tribulation is part of the law and the process.  The Law of Attraction seems to say that if we can just get in harmony with the  vibration of what we want, we won't experience the pain.  That is false, and leads us away from the understanding that in tribulation, we rely on God, plead for grace, and endure in God's timing.

Do You Suppose...

Do you suppose……?

When something happens, our mind goes to work to interpret it.  This gives meaning to the event.

Our emotions assign value to what happened.   It’s how we interpret things that make the difference.   

There is a Book of Mormon story that clearly shows how this works.

Previous to this chapter, Lehi had asked his sons, Nephi, Laman, Lemuel, and Sam, to return to Jerusalem.  They were to ask Laban, a powerful ruler, if he would give them the Brass Plates.  This was no small task.  Why would Laban want to give them the plates?    Nephi had the unshakeable faith that they would be able to accomplish this, because he knew that this was a commandment of the Lord.  Laman and Lemuel were not convinced of this, but they had all gone to Jerusalem.  

In Chapter 5, we find that the brothers had returned to their parents, and had obtained the plates due to Nephi’s faith and diligence.   Lehi and Sariah (his wife) were very glad.

The verses tell us, though, that while the boys were gone, Sariah had mourned.   

Verse 2 says:  For she had supposed that we had perished in the wilderness; and she had also complained against my father, telling him that he was a visionary man; saying:  Behold, thou hast led us forth from the lands of our inheritance, and my sons are no more, and we perish in the wilderness.

Sariah’s “supposings” were very  logical.  The wilderness was very dangerous.  Laban was a very powerful man, and not  a righteous one.  He wouldn’t willingly give her sons the plates just because they asked for them, and Sariah knew this.  He would probably have her sons killed just because they dared to approach him about it.  The boys had been gone a long time.  She supposed they were dead.  It was logical that they would die, too, in the wilderness.

She “supposed” wrong.

Contrast that with Lehi’s “supposings”.

Verse 5.  For behold, I have obtained a land of promise, in which things I do rejoice; yea, and I know that the Lord will deliver my sons out of the hands of Laban, and bring them down again to us in the wilderness.

Lehi’s “supposings” were totally different.  They surely were in the wilderness, not in a land of promise - and yet to him, the land of promise was as real as if they were already there.  It had been given to him, and he knew it.  He also knew that his sons were coming.  He might not see them now, but they would return.

We can use this in our lives to help us keep faith, be strong, and to be full of courage.  What do we “suppose”?  Do we “suppose” with the eye of faith - or with the “logical” thinking of the world?  

It matters.

Confidence Comes As We Choose What to Feel

One of the great truths of emotional health is that we can actually choose what we want to feel.  We can be in charge of our emotions and our feelings.  When we are consciously taking charge of what we feel, we will be confident.

So when we don't feel confident, it's time to look at our emotions.  Have we chosen the emotions that we want?  If not, how do we choose differently?

Choose to have faith.  Choose to change our heart and seek love.  With faith, hope, charity, and love, we will be qualified for the work.  That is confidence of the greatest sort.

Doctrine and Covenants 4:5 “And faith, hope, charity and love, with an eye single to the glory of God, qualify him for the work."

As You Go Forth

The Book of Mormon begins with the story of Lehi and his family.  In the very first chapter of 1 Nephi the story begins.  We are told how there are many prophets in Jerusalem, telling the people to repent.  Lehi is one of them.  

5 Wherefore it came to pass that my father, Lehi, as he went forth prayed unto the Lord, yea, even with all his heart, in behalf of his people.

6 And it came to pass as he prayed unto the Lord, there came a pillar of fire and dwelt upon a rock before him; and he saw and heard much;.....

Lehi was then shown a marvelous vision.  

How does this apply to emotional health?

There are many troubling things in our world today, just as Lehi faced in his day.  It would be natural to become confused, worried, or frustrated with many things that happen.  

Yet - if we can “go forth,” as Lehi did, we help ourselves out emotionally.  Just move forward - despite confusion, frustration, or uncertainty.  Make a choice to move, and move forward.  Do not stand still, and do not go back.  Move forward.  

Maybe that looks like this: If we are confused, make a choice that we think will help us move forward.  Maybe it isn’t a perfect choice.  Maybe we don’t know if it is the right choice.  But - do we think it will allow to move forward even a little bit?  Does it hold true to who we want to be?  If so, move forward.

Lehi certainly did not know that he would be asked to leave Jerusalem.  He just went forth -- forward.  

And as he did, he prayed.  We can do that too.

Miraculous things will happen as we start the momentum.

Principle One

Principle: Feelings and thoughts are energy.

When we begin thinking about emotions, the first thing we need to really understand is that feelings and thoughts are energy.  I call this Principle #1.

Too often we dismiss our emotions, thinking that they are mere “annoyances,” and that they are things that just get in the way.  

“I’ve got to get over being so frustrated,” we think, and we try hard to just keep moving on.  The trouble is - it’s not so easy.  

Those emotions matter.    So let’s talk about energy for a second.  

Emotions are real.  Emotions are literally the energy that power our lives.

We can’t see this energy, though.  We have to feel it.

Isn’t that interesting?  Our Heavenly Father’s plan includes feelings!  And - how can we understand feelings?  Obviously, it’s logical - we have to feel them.  

So - the first step is to understand that feelings are real, and that they are a form of energy.  Our Heavenly Father also made us so that we could feel.  Our feelings are important!

In future blog posts we will talk about why our feelings are necessary, and what they do for us.

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