Do today’s headlines fill you with despair?

Do you feel overwhelmed with “bad news” and don’t know how we will ever be able to “fix things”

in the world today?

Currently I am  teaching a Current Events class to high school-age students.  Sometimes I will hear

the students say, “I hate the news.  There are too many problems.”  They are growing up in an age

where people do not trust government.  They see school shootings and wonder how they can protect

themselves, not to mention protect others.


The refugee crises in the world are painful to learn about,

Are there good people in the world?   Where are the solutions?   Why should they care?  Can the problems be

solved?.    Maybe it’s just too overwhelming.

When I talk to their parents about current events, I hear them say, “I try not to pay too much attention

to what is going on,” or “I don’t keep up with current events.  It’s too depressing, and I can’t do

anything about them.”

There is a feeling of despair. The problems are so complex, and there are so many of them!

Over and over, though, I teach my students  that it’s imperative that we must know about current

events.  We must see what is really happening, and understand why it is happening.  The reason I

believe this is important is that there are solutions.  But those solutions are only going to be seen if

we learn to understand emotions.

When we understand our emotions, we can put them into context, and look for meaning.
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Principle 2:  A feeling plus a thought equals an emotion.

An ancient prophet in the Book of Mormon saw great problems in the world too..  His name was Alma.

Alma 4:Yea, he saw great inequality among the people, some lifting themselves up with their pride,

despising others, turning their backs upon the aneedy and the naked and those who were hungry, and

those who were athirst, and those who were sick and afflicted.

There were so many problems, and awful things happening, that he was filled with sorrow.  Notice,

however, that he did not let that sorrow turn into despair.  Instead, he literally infused his feeling of

sorrow with joy.  

Is that really possible? The reality of what is happening can seem totally overwhelming.  Don’t we

have to fix the problems BEFORE we can find joy?

No.  That’s actually backwards, and the reason it’s backwards is that solutions come as we

understand our emotions.

Using the Principles, we see the situation, feel it, and then examine our thoughts. We could choose  

thoughts like these,

• I will just ignore the problems.  I can’t make a difference anyway.
• The problems are too overwhelming, so I will just do the best I can.  I won’t get involved in them, or try to make a difference, because you can’t fix them anyway.

Or, as Alma taught the people, we could choose different thoughts.

Yes, Alma saw the situation.  He saw people begin to persecute one another, and he saw how that

inequality caused great “iniquity.”

But he knew that emotions lead to action.  He knew that the first step is to understand emotions .

Begin with choosing a paradigm. That’s why it’s so important to know what we are thinking and what

we are feeling.    Instead of choosing a paradigm of hopelessness, and being “stuck” in the problem,

Alma taught the people to choose “belief,” and “trust” that the situation could be resolved.

That’s where other Principles of Emotions come in.

Principle 3:  Emotions lead to action.

Since our emotions do lead to action, Alma knew that despair would lead to “inactivity” or a spirit of

pessimism.  

Principle 4:  Re-solving emotions is possible.

Alma knew this too.  In order to re-solve emotions, though, we have to re-solve our paradigm. Instead

of believing in “problems,” we have to believe in “solutions.”  Alma knew that once the people believed

there were solutions, they would find hope.  True hope leads to a feeling of joy.  That joy doesn’t come

after problems are solved; that joy comes in the middle of the solution!

That’s Principle 5:  Peace in any circumstance is possible.

Here’s what Alma helped the people understand, and here’s what happened.  He taught them of

Christ, and of that Great Day when people will accept Christ as the Savior and Redeemer.  Alma’s

time was long before the birth and subsequent death of our Savior, but he knew about that, trusted

that it would happen, and knew of the salvation that brought.  The reality of that knowledge gave him

the ability to hope, to be full of faith, and to feel joy in the present moment. That paradigm also gives

us the strength to act, and to be led by the Spirit of the Lord in ways that will allow us to find solutions

to the problems that could seem overwhelming without that Spirit.    That same reality can be ours.  

The scripture talks about it this way:

Alma 4:14 "Looking forward to that day, thus retaining a remission of their sins; being filled with

great joy because of the resurrection of the dead, according to the will and power and deliverance of

Jesus Christ from the bands of death."

When we truly understand our emotions, and re-solve them,  we will feel peace.  That true peace

comes from God.

Do you ever get discouraged?

Do you ever get discouraged?

I do.  Sometimes I feel discouraged when --

• I am overwhelmed with the things that I know really do need to be done.
• I doubt whether I am doing the “right thing,” and I am pretty sure I am not doing it the “right way”.  That’s discouraging.
• I doubt myself.  I’m not capable.  I’m just not adequate.
• I doubt what I’m doing matters to anyone, and whether I’m of any use to anyone, either.

Etc.

In times of overwhelming discouragement, I just don’t know how to “snap out of it” and “feel better.”  

It’s like saying, “Just go ahead and speak Greek.  You’ll know how if you just “feel” it in your heart.

No.  I won’t.  I won’t know how to speak Greek if I haven’t learned it.    Plain and simple. And maybe, I don’t even want to learn Greek.  

How am I going to feel better if I have to feel anything in my heart?  My heart seems frozen - closed off - close to fragmenting.

So, sometimes, I can’t rely on my heart.  Sometimes I realize that I’m just not capable of telling my heart to “do better.”

It’s at times like this that I need another solution.  There is another solution, too.

I have to rely on what I know.  I have to rely on what is in my mind.  That’s why it is so important

to have our minds filled with things that we know to be true -- even when we may not feel peace in

the moment.  If our mind is filled with hopeful thoughts --  that hold true always - and are true in a

spiritual perspective, we can pull up that information in our mind.  Rely on that, until we can get to

a place where our feelings come alive again.  

Pres. Henry B. Eyring, October 2017 Conference, “Fear Not To Do Good,” says this:

The way to optimism as we go forward was given by the Lord: “Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not” (D&C 6:36). President Monson told us how to do that. We are to ponder and apply the Book of Mormon and the words of prophets. Pray always. Be believing. Serve the Lord with all our heart, might, mind, and strength. We are to pray with all the energy of our hearts for the gift of charity, the pure love of Christ (see Moroni 7:47–48). And above all, we are to be consistent and persistent in following prophetic counsel.

When the way is difficult, we can rely on the Lord’s promise—the promise President Monson has reminded us of when he has often quoted these words of the Savior: “Whoso receiveth you, there I will be also, for I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up” (D&C 84:88).

Action Items:  

Just for today, I will:

• Put thoughts in our minds that are true - eternal - and inspiring.
• When our feelings are just “fragmented,” then rely on those thoughts.
• ACT according to those thoughts - as if you really did FEEL it.

Soon, you will notice that your feelings have shifted.  You will feel peace, calm, and comfort as you rely on what you know.

The Lord is there.  Angels are there.  We can do this.

Bowels of Mercy

Mosiah 15: 9 Having ascended into heaven, having the bowels of mercy; being filled with compassion towards the children of men; standing betwixt them and justice; having broken the bands of death, taken upon himself their iniquity and their transgressions, having redeemed them, and satisfied the demands of justice.

This verse talks  about the Savior, and the role He plays in our lives. The Savior is our salvation, and our strength, and our source of “becoming.   We can see  true principles here. The scripture begins by saying that the Savior  had the bowels of mercy, the compassion -- which gave him the strength to stand between us (sinners) and justice.  He could not have done that without the mercy and compassion that he felt.  

In a similar way, we are invited to learn to school our emotions, and to feel emotions of goodness and love, which will give us strength to do what we need to do also.  Everything is a type and shadow of our Savior, and all things follow a pattern.  I think of this as Principle #3 of emotional health:   Emotions leads to action.

It is my prayer that as we understand this, we will more fully appreciate the role of the Savior in our lives.  Truly he works with us to heal our “negative” emotions and help us come to peace.  As we learn of Him, we will be strengthened.

How Do You Handle Fear?

Sometimes life is very frightening, and hard.  This morning I listened to an excellent TED talk, given by a woman who had escaped from North Korea under very frightening situations.  

Here’s the link to that talk:  https://www.google.com/search?q=ted+talks+how+i+escaped+north+korea&oq=Ted+talk+how+I+escaped&aqs=chrome.1.69i57j0.6512j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

There can be times of “smaller” fear, too.  

I might be afraid to give a speech.

I might be a little hesitant to start a new business venture.

A year or so ago, my husband was laid off work, and I experienced fear then.  

What would happen if he couldn’t find a job before our savings ran out?

How do we handle the emotion of fear?

Our choice of how to deal with fear will depend on our paradigm.  I speak much of paradigms, because they are so very important.  A paradigm is the way we see the situation.  A paradigm might be based only on how we see one event, or it might be a way we see life in general.  That would be called a world view.

The important thing to note is that we get to choose our own paradigm.  We can see this constantly in the scriptures.  We’re told to “choose this day” whom we will serve.  We’re shown examples of people who have believed in the Lord, and what happens as a result, and we’re shown examples of people who do not choose the Lord, and we see the consequences of that paradigm too.

So - when we feel fear, what paradigm will bring us peace?  

2 Nephi 22: 2 Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid; for the Lord Jehovah is my strength and my song; he also has become my salvation.

3 Therefore, with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.

Remember the scripture that is in D&C 6:36:

Look unto me in every thought:  doubt not, fear not.

So here’s a paradigm that will bring peace:

If we look to God, and see Him as Salvation, our viewpoint will actually help change our feelings.  Instead of feeling fear, because we are looking towards God, we will feel trust, and the fear will leave.  We will know that God is our strength.  That means we will change, for we will actually BE strong, and not weak.  

We will know that God has become our salvation..

Think about it:  when we feel fear, what do we need?  We need, essentially,  salvation.  We need help of some kind.

What will be the “fruit” of that paradigm?

Verse 3, again, tells us, that “with joy shall ye draw water out of the wells of salvation.”

That’s what peace would feel like, isn’t it?  All we have to do is choose where (to what source)  to look!

Principles:  #1:  Feelings and thoughts are energy.

                    #3:  Emotions lead to action.  (We make decisions & choose our viewpoint.)

    We act, based on that viewpoint.

Overwhelmed?

Overwhelmed?

Have you ever felt totally overwhelmed?  I sure have.

Demands press down on us.  We have responsibilities and pressures.  There are things that must be done, and we are not sure how to do them.  In addition, we don’t think there is time to do it all.

We are overwhelmed.

What do we need in a situation like that?

Principle:  Our feelings tell us what we need.

Surprisingly enough,we don’t need a solution to a problem, or more energy, or a magical person to come along and help us get it all done.

We need courage.

COURAGE:  mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty.

Elder Henry B. Eyring said this:

The Lord promised love for others and courage to the Prophet Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery when the tasks ahead of them could have seemed overwhelming. The Lord said that needed courage would come from their faith in Him as their rock:

“Fear not to do good, my sons, for whatsoever ye sow, that shall ye also reap; therefore, if ye sow good ye shall also reap good for your reward.

“Therefore, fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail.

Principle:  Our feelings tell us what we need.

Many times when we feel overwhelmed, we need courage.  Our tasks seem daunting.  We don’t know how to proceed.  We are confused, and we don’t think we have the energy to needed to be successful.  

Judgment

In the Communications classes that I teach, we talk about judgment.  We learn that there are two types of judgment:  moralistic and value.

Moralistic judgment says:

“She is stupid.”  

“He’s lazy.”

We are assigning value to the person, as a PERSON, and saying who they are -- not talking about what they are doing that is creating the problem.  We are also moralistically saying that we know what is right, and what is wrong -- and we are the judge of that scale.

Value judgment, however, says this:

“Because I value honesty, I am going to vote for Bob.  I have had experiences with him in the past where he has been very honest with me.”

“I’m going to choose to work with Sam, because I value his experience and wisdom.”

Value judgments honor our ability to make our own choices, and identify our responsibility to make those choices based on what we think is important.  We acknowledge that others may make different choices based on what they value.

This morning, I was reading in the Book of Mormon.  Here’s 2 Nephi, Chapter 9, verse 7

"Wherefore, it must needs be an infinite atonement—save it should be an infinite atonement this corruption could not put on incorruption. Wherefore, the first judgment which came upon man must needs have remained to an endless duration. And if so, this flesh must have laid down to rot and to crumble to its mother earth, to rise no more."

This scripture interested me because the first judgment spoken of is a judgment that remains -- it remains in endless duration.

When we speak moralistically, we speak as if that person will always be that way.  “He’s lazy ……………...just …………...forever.”  That’s the problem with moralistic judgment.  Something happens, and we quickly leap to a moralistic judgment.  It’s our first response.

It’s more work to take a moment, think about what we value, and then respond.  But  when we do respond, we respond with what we value.  We take responsibility.  We identify what we want, and we explain why we choose that thing.  

It’s the only honest way to judge.